2/18/2020
Matthew 26:46
Lost opportunity…boy, did this one hit home
for me. Living with an anxiety disorder often times stops you cold from the
doing of life. I had avoided things for years, and frequently made myself sick
over an impending event or obligation. In my youth, it was easier for me to
cope. Although every event would drain me terribly, I could still travel and
experience wonderful things with those I loved.
Almost ten years ago, my coping abilities stopped cold, and my world
became microscopically small. I left my job, my ministries, and my
relationships. Did I feel guilt and despair? Yes, more than I can ever express;
it is a deep self-inflicted wound that I sometimes still feel.
In today’s My Utmost for His Highest, Chambers talks about when Jesus asked
His disciples to keep watch while He prayed at Gethsemane (before he was
betrayed and the Roman soldiers came), but they fell asleep instead. He came
back, and asked them once more to pray and keep watch, yet they slept again. “The
spirit is willing but the flesh is weak.” Jesus came back a third time and found them
asleep, and He told them, “Look the hour has come, and the Son of Man is
delivered into the hands of sinners. Rise! Let us go, here comes my betrayer.” (Matthew 26:
45&46) The disciples had missed
the opportunity to spend their last precious moments with Jesus before He was
arrested, and worse, did not do what He asked of them. Oh, the despair as they
watched their Master led away!
Chambers says, “Whenever we realize that we
have not done that which we had a magnificent opportunity of doing, then we are
apt to sink into despair; and Jesus Christ comes and says – ‘Sleep on now, that
opportunity is lost forever, you cannot alter it, but arise and to the next
thing.’ Let the past sleep, but let it sleep on the bosom of Christ, and go out
into the irresistible future with Him.”
Mercy. Our Lord shows us the most magnificent
mercy. Even after not listening to His direction, being willful or lazy, and
not acting on what He calls me to do, My Lord is still benevolent. Amazing
grace! Yet when I reach the point of despair and selfishly lock myself away in
shame and guilt, He calls me to rise. He is the God of new beginnings and infinite
chances; we need only to seek forgiveness, for He offers us eternal redemption.
His love for us all is truly like no other, for He is the author of love. I
never again want to miss an opportunity to spend time with those I love, or an
opportunity to spend time with my God, doing His will. My desire is to boldly
go into the irresistible future with Him.
1 comment:
I think God is telling you to visit your relatives in AZ. You can spend a lot of time being with your family and sharing your faith with the future of our world. There is 5 small people there that would like to get to know you.
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