The Least of These

 

1/4/2023

Philippians 2:4 “Let each of you not only look to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.” (ESV)

Empathy – noun

-         ~ the action of understanding, being aware of, being sensitive to, and vicariously experiencing the feelings, thoughts, and experiences of another of either the past or the present without having the feelings, thoughts, and experiences fully communicated in an objectively explicit manner

                                                                                              Miriam-Webster

I never wanted to visit my mom. Now, before your mind jumps to what a horrible statement that is, let me explain. For the last 5 years of her life, after suffering a debilitating stroke, my mom resided in a long-term care facility. She was an extremely healthy 82-year-old one moment, and the next she was completely paralyzed on her left side and unable to speak. She went from taking a handful of vitamins, to taking so many different medications that I lost count. Sadly, she was – as many older people become – reliant on others for everything, especially in the beginning. I have written about this several times in Blooms.

So, why did I start this entry with such an awful and uncaring statement? Well, because it was true. I didn’t want to spend 10 hours a day in the hospital when she was in intensive care, or to make the four-hour drive to be there. (The first week I stayed with my sister and her husband, who live closer to the hospital.) I didn’t want to spend every other weekend driving 12 hours to spend one day with her, and I CERTAINLY did not want to spend that one day at a long-term care facility. Now, many people would empathize with me about these inconveniences for sure, but I had something else going on that made all this extremely difficult. I was still clawing my way out of a dark place that almost ruined my family and my life. I was suffering from, as I still do to this day, clinically diagnosed OCD and anxiety. To make matters even worse, my OCD takes that form of – you guessed it – germaphobia.

 

So, being at a hospital was excruciating for me. Visiting her at the long-term care facility was even worse. No one would have faulted me for not going; my family knew what had kept me housebound and stopped me living over a year of my life. Now, this is not a pat-my-own-back moment. This is about how God’s grace got me through that time, but also about my mom. Like I said, I didn’t want to go, but I knew I had to. I was struggling, sure, but it was NOTHING compared to what my mother was enduring. Thankfully, empathy was the emotion that rose to the top for me during that time. I mentally put myself in my mother’s shoes, and that was all it took. I think it helped that I understood what it was like to be trapped, although she was trapped in her body, and I was trapped in my mind. When I was trapped, did I want to endure my suffering alone? No, and thankfully, I had my family with me. Now it was mom’s turn.

Now, I could say that I visited her for hours and hours because I pitied her, or because I felt I owed her a debt for taking care of me and raising me. Neither was true, though. I spent time with her because I knew how important it was for her emotional, spiritual, and even physical well-being. I knew this because of empathy, and empathy is certainly a Biblical precept. Jesus commanded believers to take care for “the least of these”. He mentions widows and orphans specifically; however, we are called to care about, and for, everyone. Take a beat for a second and let that filter through. Everyone. If we cannot bring ourselves to care for those closest to us, no matter the reason, how will we ever be able to care for people we do not know?  Jesus calls us to love one another like He loves us, no exceptions.

Love requires action! We cannot just claim Christ and read scripture or the latest hot Bible study. We MUST apply His words in our lives and to the lives of others.  

John 13:34 & 35 “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another. By this all people will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” (ESV)

I will freely admit, I was uncomfortable and had to fight my mind every time I visited my mom. Yet the battle was worth the look in her beautiful bright blue eyes when they fell upon me every time I walked into her room. I would not trade those visits for anything this world could offer. They are now my sweetest memories of time spent with her.

Even though it may be difficult, every day is a new day, and we all have another chance to follow the command of Jesus to love one another as He loves us.

Galatians 6:2 “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. (ESV)