The Power of an Image

 

2/17/2022

1 Peter 5:7 "Casting all of your anxieties on Him, because he cares for you."

I had a rough afternoon. My brain was on fire with fearful OCD thoughts. These are, of course, in direct opposition to my faith focus. It is difficult to explain how it works, but suffice it to say, it is extremely exhausting. This hot brain of mine started when I came in contact with a person who very recently had Covid. They actually had Delta, ugh! Now, even though this individual stayed home for roughly 13 days, they still sounded and acted very ill. Even though I was uncomfortable, I didn't say anything. When I was frustrated with myself and texted my brother, he said, "Social conventions and courtesy will get the best of you sometimes." Boy, did he hit that nail squarely on the head!

After this person's departure, the awful OCD mind started kicking in, and I felt the panic in me rising. Now, my fear brain works very quickly forming possible dangerous scenarios to battle the beast, and Covid is the monster that never sleeps. I was strategizing how I would maneuver being home with my family there. For the next week I would; 1. Wear a mask 24/7. 2. Sleep in the guest room. 3. Eat alone. 4. Stay away from everyone. 5. Take several at-home Covid test. Then, as the compulsions began, I started looking up all kinds of information about transmission, masking, variants, and other CDC guidance. This is what I refer to as "going down the black hole." The glut of information usually just muddies the truth. I have a strict rule to not search the internet this way; however, today I broke that rule. All this usually ends with me wrapped in a blanket passed out on the couch.  

Today, thankfully, things ended differently. First my son lobbed me some truth bombs and advice. Then my siblings offered support and prayer.  Afterward, while I was just on the cusp of a panic attack, I called my husband and he prayed with me. Then another friend, who happened to be in the building where all this took place, compassionately listened and helped me talk things through, and offered to pray for me as well. So, my breath came back to a normal rhythm and my brain started to cool down. Shorty before I left for home, I passed a mirror and saw that I was wearing the white and blue anchor mask my sister made me. That image was so strong that the rest of my anxiety left my body immediately, and I smiled. My brain cooled as I thought of one of my favorite verses of scripture. Hebrews 5:19 "We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure. It enters the inner sanctuary behind the curtain, where our forerunner, Jesus, has entered on our behalf..."

Not only had God provided me with people to help me, but He gave me a powerful visual to remind me that my hope is, and always will be, in Jesus. Because of this, I not only didn't wind up curled up on the couch, but instead took my puppy for an hour long afternoon walk. To God be the glory!

During difficult times, if we take a pause to focus on Jesus, He will be there to right our ship that is being tossed in the storm. He is our anchor when the waves are crashing all around, and He will never let us be overtaken by them.